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Post by TLCM on Mar 17, 2003 5:23:21 GMT -5
I've been out searching for a life but like always it has passed me by. So here I am.
Damn I suck, what a fucking loser. No I don't have PMS.
If you were me you would hate me to.
I know nothing of my friends but they don't know that I exist, or if they know they don't show it. I can't even win a game of Soccer. I want so much but feel like I have nothing. I don't want objects, I want more than that, I want to be appreciated, not by you but by people in general, especially by those who are supposed to appreciate me. I have contributed nothing to anythihng, ever. What have I accomplished? Nothing. I could die tomorrow and it would take people 2 weeks to notice I'm not there.
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Post by josha on Mar 17, 2003 5:30:38 GMT -5
Your fucked up.
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Post by Dudley on Mar 17, 2003 5:38:09 GMT -5
heyyyy - teenage angst! Welcome, please leave your soul at the door. Just think TLCM.. in a year or two's time you'll be out of whereever you are if you want, doing what you want. And stuff other people, people are overrated.. And as for not accomplishing anything, who has these days? I mean.. sure you have....  Feel better oh depressed one. |
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Post by sarah on Mar 17, 2003 5:38:26 GMT -5
everyone feels like shit at times - you've just got to ride out the bad with the good. if you want to rant at someone drop me a line at unsentletter@hotmail.com - granted my advice is usually pretty lame, but sometimes it helps to talk about stuff. the offer's there anyway. you're young kid. you've got your whole life ahead of ya. things will get better, i promise.  |
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Post by slushpup on Mar 17, 2003 6:05:12 GMT -5
dont get too down TLCM....we all get like this sometimes. ive talked to you and know that you are worthwhile and appreciated. soccer? fuck soccer. i can hardly kick a ball straight in that game.  cheer up tiger. hope you feel better soon. ps- noone hates you...they really dont. you're a great person. |
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Post by everlong on Mar 17, 2003 6:53:54 GMT -5
Tanya,
Things change for the better. Honestly. Read my journal on my website. All holidays (up until 3 weeks ago) I was just down with everything, in a job I hated, and with very little social life at all, and my friends screwed around with me (not literally, they were just unreliable fucks).
In the span of three weeks, i've quit my job, gotten a girlfriend, gone out with the friends that still mattered and have done a complete 360 degree turn as opposed to three weeks ago.I never believed things could change for the better, but they do when you least expect it.
You've got my msn addy (desoMVP@hotmail.com) if ever you want to talk. PM me if you want. Talking with those that do care is the best way to just get over this.
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Post by sam on Mar 17, 2003 8:51:49 GMT -5
Yes, my god. Life is Grand. I love everything, everybody. Don't hurt yourself. Please. My god, I'm on such a high at the moment. I coudl kiss you.
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Post by criminally vulgar on Mar 17, 2003 10:17:30 GMT -5
Yes, my god. Life is Grand. I love everything, everybody. Don't hurt yourself. Please. My god, I'm on such a high at the moment. I coudl kiss you. I'm lonely, come over and give me head sam. |
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Post by captain heinemann on Mar 17, 2003 22:57:44 GMT -5
I'm lonely, come over and give me head sam. only they could turn tanya feeling crap into them having sex. tlcm: have you seen bowling for columbine? well you should. in it michael moore taks to trey parker (the south park guy) and he says how they way they treat you primary shcool and high school is really crap cos it makes you think that thats the end of the road. you do yr 12 and then yuve accomplished all..well stuff along those lines. pretty much sayign that school isnt the end of the road and there life after that. the firneds you have proabbly do appreciate you but just think that you know it and dont want to say it. i know if i say to a mate like oh thank you for doing this your great i get the shit teased out of me and called a lesbian which is fucked. so yeah... and with soccer. like slushpup said who cares? and if you really do care about soccer and it sreally important to you then hey, you had a bad game or a bad time or a bad week but whatever. stuff changes. life goes on. (and on a lighter note. i have FOUR DOLLARS to last me then next two weeks. FOUR DOLLARS. for food and rik and tram tickets and bus tickets and going out and presents and parties and alch. FOUR DOLLARS. now thats nothing.) |
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Post by captain heinemann on Mar 17, 2003 22:59:41 GMT -5
man, you're a loser? how can you say that in the face of ell and josha and swank and aaron and ME?  ? ME? ?? ;D keep smiling!!!! |
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Post by kelly on Mar 18, 2003 4:08:37 GMT -5
dont worry mate, everyone goes through periods like that
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Post by TLCM on Mar 18, 2003 20:43:00 GMT -5
Thankyou.
I'm ok now but Monday was shit for me. I'm usually ok if I can do something I love but I don't get many oppertunities for that. I realise that in a few months I'll be out of this hole and will be able to meet new people with the same interests as me and I'll be able to get out and do stuff. My friends probably do appreciate me I guess I just feel kinda neglected because I'm always the last to know anything. It took 4 months for me to find out I was the only person in my 'group' whose still a virgin and that plus alot of other shit just pushed me over the edge I guess. I'm one of those people who finds it difficult to express themselves, I can't cry in public or yell at anyone ever, so I bottle everything up and either pour it out into a diary, pillow or some poor person on msn. I'm not usually like this, the reason I can't express myself is because up until recently I've had nothing to express. I've never been depressed up until now, but for no known reason I get into bad moods and depressions more and more.
Soccer is nothing, or not much, not worth getting mad/upset about. I love playing it though and I used to always play it, just not in a club. For the first time in ages I played in the school team against Scone on Monday. I used to be kind of good, I'm always defence and when I was fitter and 4kg lighter I used to never let the other team have the ball. I had put everything in the past two weeks into this game (I even got up at 6:30am to go for a run before school and trained every lunch time), Scone (horse capital) could easily be beaten. I went expecting to win. But we didn't win, it was 3-2 and I watched every one of their goals from the bench. I'm never a spectator, I can't stand not doing it myself. I know that is the lamest and worst attitude to have but it was a knockout and I get really competitive and we could have easily beaten them, we just didn't. *You should also note that I always think I am better than I am, I like art and think I've done a good work then when I see it the next day or week i realise how absolutly shit it is. I can only judge myself in hindsight.
Soccer wasn't why I was depressed, it was just a whole heap of shit that had been building up inside me.
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Post by I_H8_JEBS on Mar 18, 2003 22:18:58 GMT -5
Yes, my god. Life is Grand. I love everything, everybody. Don't hurt yourself. Please. My god, I'm on such a high at the moment. I coudl kiss you. GOD SAID TWICE! for a moment there i thought we were talking about Zwan!!?!??!! |
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Post by josha on Mar 18, 2003 23:01:15 GMT -5
More like........ ZWGAY
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Post by I_H8_JEBS on Mar 18, 2003 23:02:59 GMT -5
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We cant all be hArDC0Re PuNX like you 
?